okay, i was in desperate need of a new pair of tennis shoes [SIDE NOTE: why are they called 'tennis' shoes? i'm not playing tennis?] anyway, off to wal-mart we go - don't usually like to shop at the evil empire but like i said, i was desperate for shoes and my son needed pants that did not indicate flooded conditions LOL i will tell you now that i am not a 'SHOPPER', nope, contrary to the fact that i boobs and ovaries, i would rather NOT have to go shopping, call me weird! and i particularly do not like clothes and shoes shopping for myself - those 3 way mirrors in the dressing room reveal a side of me i'd rather forget, you know, my BACKSIDE that has gotten increasingly larger the past few years. [SIDE NOTE: i have this condition that does not allow me to recognize the ACTUAL size of my rump! its true, i am constantly getting stuck in between furniture, countertops, tables, etc due to my 'condition'; i also frequently knock things other, including small children, with my rump since i always UNDERESTIMATE its girth, width, awesome presence LOL]
and i also have hard to fit feet - i have no arch and they are almost as wide as they are long, sigh, you know those shoes the frankenstein monster wore? ok, those are the kind that fit the shape of my feet. nonetheless, i WAS not going home without a new pair of shoes - i really didn't care about the color, red outlines, pink strips, blue dots, lucky clovers, yellow moons, oh sorry, that's a cereal commercial. well, lo and behold there were 2, count them, 2 pairs of shoes in my size and i chose, you guessed it, the generic knock-off the the BUTT TONER shoes. what i really like about them is that they add about 2 1/2 inches to my height [at 4ft 11 3/4 inches, i could use all the height i can get!] the best part of the shopping trip however was my 14 year daughter teasing me about having a firm 'booty' - she did this little 'maneuver', a shake, indulating thingey that started at her feet and ended at her 'booty'. WOW, i thought, i can't move like that anymore, i don't think i could EVER move like that and i could wear these shoes 24/7. anyway, by summer and bathing suit wearing weather [cough, cough, cough LOUDLY] i should have a more toned and fit butt! we shall see...maybe i'll take before and after pix....NOT
Let me know if they work....I too suffer from SUMBS (seriously underestimating my booty size)... and I could use to firm up as well... Of course I could just lay off the beer and late night snacks... but what's the fun in that?
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