Funny Forwards: Funny Texan

Friendly Texan or Too Tight Mini-skirt

In a crowded city at a busy bus stop, a beautiful young woman wearing
a tight mini skirt was waiting for a bus. As the bus stopped and it
was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to
allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus.
Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she
reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little, thinking that this would give
her enough slack to raise her leg. She tried to take the step, only to
discover that she couldn't.
So, a little more embarrassed, she once again reached behind her to
unzip her skirt a little more, and for the second time attempted the step.
Once again, much to her chagrin, she could not raise her leg.
With a little smile to the driver, she again reached behind to unzip
a little more and again was unable to take the step.
About this time, a large Texan who was standing behind her picked her
up easily by the waist and placed her gently on the step of the bus
She went ballistic and turned to the would-be Samaritan and yelled,
"How dare you touch my body! I don't even know who you are!"
The Texan smiled and drawled, "Well, ma'am, normally I would agree
with you, but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kind'a figured we was
friends."

mocking bird - the official bird of texas

never have i seen such a tenacious bird as the mocking bird. they defend their turf like nobody's business, going up against feral cats and other birds - even much larger birds like the turkey vulture so common to central texas. just this morning as max and i were out walking, i saw a pair of mockingbirds swooping and dive "bombing" a cat, chasing it away from their nesting tree - continuing to chase the cat across the street until the cat finally sought refuge under a parked car. then the birds still squawked and continue to swoop down, letting their feline enemy know that they mean business! i'm not sure who the voting committee was or what other birds were up for review, but considering the determination and some would say hard-headedness of us texans, the mockingbird is the perfect choice! one can see them perched on just about anything that they can find - from cars, to fire hydrants, to clothes lines, to telephone poles, as if to survey all they can see as their domain. i have seen them attack dogs as well - our lady, a terrier mix, would delight in gobbling up any unfortunate hatchling that fell out of the nest but then would have to endure the punishment from the parents.